Thursday, May 04, 2006

Jealousy

Yup, we've all been there. Jealous of your man (or woman) out with their friends, doing something without you that you wished you'd been asked to do, or you're simply cranky pants and need to vent on something...and an otherwise nonjealous moment seems like a good opportunity. Jealous of friends? Occasionally I go there, but usually it's in a good way. The way I figure it, life's just way too darn short to get worked up over stuff concerning significant others or friends. If you don't trust the person, why be associated with them?

This is stemming from a couple of things I've noticed this week with various acquaintances and my response to a few things. I started with a blog the other day making a comment about living the single life, and how unhappy many people seem to be unless they are permanently attatched to somebody else. Of course I'd love to have some serious relationship going again if the circumstances were right, but why complain? So I'm making the best of what I've got in the now, and I'm happy! Jealousy? Let's start with myself first...if I had to say I was jealous of anything at the moment, it's my friends who live close to town, or in larger towns and are either making comments to get my rear-end out of here and somewhere closer to a city while their having a grand 'ol time in a bar somewhere, or to come on down and visit with them. Occasionally this is doable, but 8 or so times out of 10 I really can't afford to be traipsing back and forth into town just to be social. This does have it's pros though: I don't spend much money on social situations for a start. So I'm just calling this jealousy a good test for my determination to stay on track money wise, and make the best of it all when I do get out. Other jealousies? The beautiful children you all seem to be popping out! But that's a good thing!

An observation I made earlier this week concerns a close friend of mine who can never seem to make a decision about doing much of anything without running it by her boyfriend first. This is a great, beautiful chicka who is a ton of fun to get out with, but since that hardly happens I've quite asking her to join me on the weekends as much as I used to. She can't seem to go more than 10 minutes without talking to that boy and he'll call if she isn't calling him. Needless to say, makes for a difficult conversation. Love? I think not. Possessiveness is more like it. How can you NOT trust the person you supposedly love? to me, keeping tabs on someone is not only a waste of time, but how BORING! I mean, wouldn't you all get tired of wondering, worrying, arguing...I mean, how much anxiety is that! Let's die young over 'love'? Maybe I need to get her to consider what she thinks 'love' really is...

Another situation I was a bit involved with that got me quite angry actually...I have a friend who lives down in the city who was quite interested in me last fall. Despite enjoying talking with him and e-mailing back and forth, I never really felt he and I would make much of a good couple, especially after considering our very different lifestyles. Since we were only friends I casually mentioned hooking him up with a friend of mine since I felt he was a great guy, albeit not for me. His response, "I'm interested in you, not some friend and wouldn't appreciate being passed around your social circle." Hmmmm...ego? So we lost contact for awhile 'cause I thought that was just silly since I thought I was paying him a compliment. Anyway, we get back in touch a few months later, I make a few comments about how great of friends we could be if he quits with the constant flirting, and we continue on with the friendship. I'm assuming this is just fine, but he pops in the other day with a totally unacceptable, somewhat jealous comment (by my standards) about something he read on my blog. It wasn't funny, or teasing and hit a pretty sore note with me. I mention this, and how it wasn't funny; his reply? He just tore me apart and said something pretty nasty. My God! I wasn't asking for an apology, though it would have been nice; simply asked him to consider how others may interpret what he says. So I guess he quite hasn't given up thinking we could be more than friends-which I'm pretty sure I don't even want to put any effort into anymore. What a waste.

1 comment:

Diana Stark said...

Trust me, I know how you feel...I'll definitely get the third degree (or the silent treatment) when I get back from NYC.